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The Christian Bale Files

The original:



The techno remix:



The Christian Bale vs. Bill O'Reilly remix:



Amazing. It's a shame, in the end, about all of this fuckery - Christian Bale is talented as hell, and I bet that lighting guy did actually eff his ess up. While screaming at dude for four minutes *may* not have been the best resolution, Christian Bale is Batman, and Patrick Bateman, and John Connor. And Dieter Dengler. He's all of those. He's like Bo Jackson, if Bo Jackson was also Michael Phelps and Wayne Gretzky, and Rudolf Nureyev, and Ricky Henderson, and Bo Jackson. Do you know how awesome that is? Dude really shouldn't have fucking touched Bale's fucking lights. Fuck.

Drugs are Kool

Check out this high kid after a visit to his neighborhood dentist.  I wish I was this cool when I'm wasted. 

Highlights:

* "Is this real life?"

*"is this going to be forever?"

*"arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

BTW: I hope the dad repeatedly asking if it 'feels good' doesn't come back to bite him.  

Thanks Hailey for the video.

Clay Aiken as a child, except less weird looking

I LOVE how the kid's go-to dance move is to hug himself, shiver, and slightly bounce his body up and down. It's inexplicable (but terrific), and I shall be testing it out on the dance floor asap. I imagine it's what Jello Biafra looks like when he sings, or what people look like as they slowly slip into the cold clutches of hypothermia.
Anyway... there's not too much to say about this video, actually. It's a blond-haired kid, dancing and singing to Britney Spears (both badly, I should add, though I risk coming across as too harsh a critic - I just have my standards for Internet dancing, and it starts and ends with Aunt Jackie, basically), and then his mom scares him, and he promptly lets loose a horrific scream that fades out as he collapses on the floor, presumably dead, while his mom chuckles.